How do YOU feel when you hear the alarm in the morning?

That was the question posed to me along with all the other new McLaughlin college students by our brand new academic advisor Mr. Terry Conlin. He advised that we can only be happy if we find ourselves doing something we love to do. Money isn't everything and just because someone has a job with a high income, that does not necessarily make them happier.

Everything in my life has been so hectic lately, it's been difficult to draw the line between what I want and what's expected of me to do. My parents and brother left at 1AM to New Jersey and I stayed behind with my grandmother making this weekend the FIRST weekend I spend at home WITHOUT my parents. At first it seemed AMAZING, but now that I am exneriecing the FIRST 24 hours without them .. I've discovered how hard life can be on your own.

I've been forced to grow up and mature more and faster then I can ever remember. I took the GO Transit by myself for the FIRST time yesterday when I went to my York Orientation and I've made a few new friends as well as met future classmates. I'm starting to see my future form but at the same time I'm starting to realize that things that I USED to think would be priority are starting to become secondary.

The people I love and the people I know are becoming that much more important and I feel like I have to work 10X harder to ensure that they stay in my ever moving present.

Life's starting to shift into gear and I feel like if I slow down at ALL.. I'm going to be run over by everything expected of me; Not to mention I must always keep in mind the things and people I love above all else.

Frosh Week starts in 3 days so I might not be able to update my blog as much as I WANT to .. but writing will ALWAYS be part of my life.

So to answer the question how I feel when I hear the alarm in the morning? ... It's bittersweet.

I wake up knowing that it'll be another day with the people that I love, but at the same time I have to deal with life's constant struggles and my own inner struggle to figure out who I am, what I'm meant to be and how to achieve the goal of discovering myself.

PS. I am doing my VERY best to find time in my life schedule to start working on a sequel to my "Dead and Divine" short story, but I'm not sure exactly how it'll work out. I'll keep you posted.

- Francis Frustration